Is spending up big on a date necessary?

I realise that you all want to make a big first impression in the early stages of dating a new love interest. You want everything to go smoothly and leave them wanting more. But does that mean you have to spend up large to impress them?

It certainly may seem like a great way of sweeping your new partner off their feet. Taking them to an expensive restaurant, getting front row tickets for a concert, or taking them away for a surprise weekend. The bigger the better right? Wrong! You don't need to throw money around on a date to get a new love interest interested. This can put a lot of undue pressure on you to come up with an amazing date - and can severely blow out your budget. It can also set you up for creating unrealistic or unsustainable expectations for future experiences together.

Instead of putting yourself under this type of pressure, change up your focus. Rather than trying to create an experience that requires lots of money, turn your attention to having a date with the following characteristics:

Lots of fun

Encourages talking

Allows plenty of quality time together

Gets you doing something different/ out of your comfort zone

Keeps to a small budget

Is casual

Happens during the day

By focusing on creating a quality date that's all about the connection between the two of you rather than the money, you'll make a far greater impact. It will take away all the stress, and you can sit back and really enjoy the experience rather than worry about maxing out your credit card.

John Aiken, RSVP dating and relationship expert, as seen on the hit show Married At First Sight, and on Ch 9’s Today show, Today Extra and A Current Affair. He is a best-selling author, regularly appears on radio and in magazines, runs a private practice in Sydney, and is a sought after speaker. (

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