What if sparks don't fly on the first date?

It's what we all want as singles. The perfect first date experience. Witty conversation, sexual chemistry, lots of flirting and laughter, and an amazing end of date kiss. You both leave the date feeling on a high - excited, giddy and wanting more.

But what happens if you go on a first date and sparks don't fly? Does this mean you need to give it more time or should you simply cut your ties and run? Having spent many years talking to couples about how they first met, I've heard both sides of the story. Some have said that there were sparks immediately when they saw each other and they knew they were meant to be together. On the other hand, there are those couples that tell me that there were no sparks in the beginning, but they grew into their love and passion for each other. So what approach should you take if there are no sparks? My advice to you here is put your decision in the hands of time. If there are no sparks flying between the two of you, be patient. Give your date a chance to shine and grow on you. The more time you spend talking to them and getting to know them, the more opportunity you'll have to see if a spark can grow. If there's still absolutely no chemistry after a number of dates, then you have your answer - it's probably never going to work. But if passion starts to build between you both, then push forward. It has potential to be something special. John Aiken, RSVP dating and relationship expert, as seen on Ch 9's series Married At First Sight, and the ABC doco Making Couples Happy. He is also the author of the book Making Couples Happy: How science can help get relationships back on track (www.johnaiken.com.au)

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