You had a great first date - how do you know if they're into you?
So you've woken up the next morning after having an amazing first date. You've jumped out of bed, had a shower and got dressed - all the time running over in your head everything that happened. What you did, what you talked about and what overall impression you left on them. You think that it was a hugely successful experience - but you're not 100% sure? So how do you really know if they're into you and want to see you again?
1. Your date asked plenty of questions Throughout the evening your date made the effort to get to know you. They asked you plenty of questions and took an interest in your life. They wanted to know about your past experiences, goals, current responsibilities and opinions. 2. Your date was complimentary During the date, they often complimented you and made you feel special and desired. They found it easy to praise and be positive about you and your life direction and were supportive of your goals. 3. Your date was organised and punctual They turned up right on time and made the whole experience run to plan. They did prep work, research and called ahead to make bookings to ensure the outcome of the date was a success. 4. Your date shared personal information The conversation wasn't a one-way process. Instead, your date was prepared to disclose personal details and open up about some of their own experiences. When you asked questions - they were happy to respond in detail. 5. Your date smiled and gave you lots of eye contact Throughout the whole experience your date gazed at you and smiled. They gave you their full attention and made you feel as though you were important, interesting and desired. 6. Your date ignored their phone During the experience, you never had to compete with your date's phone. Instead, they either turned it off, put it on silent or simply ignored it whenever it rang. And there was no texting while you were trying to talk and connect. Their focus was on you and technology never got in the way of you feeling number one. 7. Your date listened to your opinions, ideas and values At no time during the experience did you feel that they put down your ideas, values or opinions. Even if you differed on certain topics or beliefs, they always showed respect for your position rather than trying to prove you wrong or make you feel dumb. 8. Your date showed you affection At various stages of the date, they initiated affection with you. I'm not taking about sex, but rather they engaged in different forms of low level affection such as hand holding, putting their arm around you, touching your shoulder and kissing you. 9. Your date contacted you afterwards to say 'thanks' After you finished your date, you received some form of contact from them to say thanks and to express how much they enjoyed the experience. It may be before you fell asleep that night or early the next morning - but they followed-up to show you they're keen. 10. Your date wanted to make future plans with you During the date, they suggested different opportunities for the both of you to meet up again. There was a definite interest and motivation from them to organize a follow-up date so they could see more of you.
John Aiken, RSVP dating and relationship expert, as seen on Ch 9's series Married At First Sight, and the ABC doco Making Couples Happy. He is also the author of the book Making Couples Happy: How science can help get relationships back on track (www.johnaiken.com.au)