At this time of year, there’s always a decision to make when planning for the family Xmas. There are presents to buy, different family members to consider, and special traditions to uphold. On top of this, if you’ve just started seeing someone new, then you also need to decide if you’re ready to take them home to meet everyone?
So, is there a right time to do this, and how do you make that decision?
Well if you’re in this situation during the upcoming festive period, then consider these five key areas:
1) Time together
If you’ve only just met your date recently, over the past weeks, then it’s probably best to avoid the big family gathering. It’s too new and you don’t really know each other well enough yet to do the big family Xmas.
2) Level of commitment
It’s important to know where you stand in terms of commitment before introducing your date to the family. If this is just fun and casual, then don’t bother. However, if the two of you are thinking long-term, then it’s not a bad idea for your date to meet everyone.
How strongly are you into each other? If you’re not really feeling anything strong or exciting for this new date, and it’s got a feel of “friends not lovers”, then give the family Xmas a miss. However, if you’re really into each other and there’s massive chemistry, then jump right in. This new relationship has real potential.
4) Social skills
Meeting the family for Xmas is a big step for a new date. It can be daunting, intimidating and can really test a person’s confidence. So, consider their level of social skills. If they’re shy and scared – then don’t do it. However, if they’re a social butterfly and can easily cope with new social situations, then they’re ready to meet the crew.
5) Shared goals for the year ahead
If this date has a vision of the future that is similar to yours, and you feel as though the year ahead is looking very bright for the both of you, then jump in and meet the family. You’ve got a common set of goals for the upcoming year, and it’s time to step up and have a family Xmas with everyone.
John Aiken, RSVP dating and relationship psychologist, as seen on the hit show Married At First Sight, and on Ch 9’s Today show, Today Extra and A Current Affair. He is a best-selling author, regularly appears on radio and in magazines, runs a private practice in Sydney, and is a sought after speaker. (www.johnaiken.com.au)